We, the handsome devils....

The most extravagant thing I can think of at this very moment is being able to speak your language. Any language really.
everyday passes and each one has a brilliant theme that is so often overlooked. Today's theme was language. A few months ago I had a great cooking themed day. Sometimes the theme is easy to spot, but often not. Things that pop up more than once in the same day goes far beyond coincidence.
"I've gone ferral and I don't speak the language anymore. You can bring out all your weapons, you cant make me go to war"

everything is marvelous. Evolution is slow and cold. Meaning of life part 3: fighting each other

so what's underneath then? The daemons of my subconscious will tell me tonight. What handsome devils those boys are. I can't wait.
Good night.

Crumbs in my Lungs

North east west and south. Together they are news. Together, this is discoveryblog.

I'm going to go to Dawson. Just give me a couple weeks to scrape something together and I'll be there. don't worry. I'll probably come back. My bus ticket is cheaper if I get a return.
what an exciting trip. Going to see all those people and all those bands at the Dawson city music festival. Threes nothing quite as satisfying as taking a long trip by yourself. Especially where threes a guaranteed light at the end. A friendly face you haven't seen I a little too long.

last night I watched a concert from the front porch of a rustic old cabin. Say no to drugs kids. This includes alcohol and tobacco.

here's my new wish. I wish I could stop falling in love with every girl I see.
its becoming a serious problem and inconvenience.

Wild World

I cant sleep again and feel like I've been up all night burning bridges. I've never really liked thunderstorms, maybe that's it.
what do I do when I cant sleep? I come on the computer and try to clear up the things in my head. All here for no one. Its always been about me, and it always will be.
I think I'm waiting here for someone. Or maybe something electronic. Something to love maybe. How did I go from a night of lovely music to a night of fire and lightning. All I know is that my first cd will be dedicated to my mom and dad for they're patience with my aloofness and melodrama. A 22 year old with parental angst is a hideous beast indeed.
sometimes I wonder if I'm a hard person to know. When I think of my personality around certain friends I wonder if I would really want to be my friend. You are what you pretend to be but what am I. Am I the guy who talks a lot but never says anything? I feel so annoying.

I did discovery one wonderful thing today. I need to be alone. I need to be bored. Eventually I pick up my instrument and the most wonderful things start to flow from me. I start to remember why I play in the first place. For me. Its always been about me, and it always will be.

Blogger McBlogington

Someone tell me what I should be doing with all this free time? My shifts are so completely ridiculous that I always ends up with several hours of wondering what I should be doing. The answer is obvious. I probably should be working. If I work a 4 hour shift (which is often) then I spend the following four hours waiting around for everyone else to get off work.
the real drag is that recently instead of paid work, I've been assigned charity work. The cause is the aesthetic value of my mother's garden. Apparently I need to contribute to my household. I agree but I think my contribution should be never being home. So what do I do? Find a second job? Murder someone and take their hours? I just cant seem to find a second job. No one wants to hire a bearded long hair. And murder is a apparently a crime these days.
or maybe I should just spend every waking hour of the day blogging it up.
or maybe say fuck all y'all and head up to the Yukon with even else.
someone just give me something to do that isn't renovating my parents back yard.

Titties

Never ever watch summer television.
its gotten to the point where I see so many TV tittes it should be a cliche. I just want to learn about the great Boer war, or where to stay in Cambodia. That's what I want when I watch TV. I watch porno if I want titties. That's what the internet is for. That and blogging
if I had the energy and motivation I would sit in the grass somewhere all day with someone and sing folk songs.
I don't have the motivation so I'm finally going to beat anikin in SWIII and get back to my life....

Descoberta e a Corrida Contra Tempo

trouble with the neighbors. These things can get the best of you I suppose. Wait it out maybe? I guess.
is it really worth my time to attempt an articulate explanation of why I'm in the state that I am in? Probably not but there's nothing else to do. Except maybe review music I've been listening to lately. Its hard to pick just one paticular disc. I guess I'll do the new Stephen malkmus and the new white stripes. In all fairness I haven't really given the white stripes new album a good listen yet but thus far I'm pretty content with it. While keeping the same basic style as the first 4 albums, the music has changed quite a bit and the whole thing seemed a little rushed. Its certainly not as good as white blood cells or de stijl. It maybe matches up with the self titled I would say. Check it out anyway, its interesting.
as for Stephen malkmus's face the truth. Well to me it a just a new pavement record, and that's great. However its really unfair to compare the album to pavement, because its not. The songs are catchy and have a really great style. If you like the other two malkmus solo releases you'll probably like this one and same if you're a die-hard pavement fan. Something for everyone.
as for what on the player right now I have the flashing lights second album sweet release. I've had this album for such a long time but I just never really put it on enough to get into it. That's one of the downfalls to having way too many cds. I just don't have time sometimes. Then you miss out on the good. Maybe I just wasn't ready for this album back in 2001. And why haven't the lights put out anyhtign new since then? What's the deal with that? I guess the super friends did re-form in 2003 but they also haven't done much since then. I need more east coast rock for my youth. Everyone does.

on to other issues, we're all so depressed and don't know why. Too depressed to leave the house. We should just pair up, but boredom doesn't work that way. We're in a little too deep. Someone with energy please send us a rescue boat.

Never Been a Mountain Man

Another half drunk post. Possibly fully drunk. Its hard to tell at this point. This will be the last time I ever mention my mental state in a blog. The purpose of this information is to give my reader(s) a sense of rhythm.
what's with the depressing blog? Is a question often asked of me. And there isn't really a good answer. I cant really help it. I feel fine now, I feel like making love to the world. The problem is waking up next to the world in the morning can really get you down.
that came out all wrong.
I still read the news. The problem is that being so concerned can take a lot out of a person. I'm not really one to take things seriously, however, when you think of the number of yellow bracelets to green of white bracelets, the world does get you down.
there's not really any love anymore. Scratch that, there never really was. There was a rise of love in the 60's that was brutally shut down in 1970 when the beatles broke up. Then love was again defaced 10 year later in 1980 when john lennon was murdered. Ever since then love has been kept on the down low.
try as we might love has stayed just below the top soil
still, all is not lost.
you can still hear it when you walk into the right place, when the right music is playing. No one knows your name but is all fine. We all in the same place for the same reasons. Everyone knows the same thing and we know it will all come to us in the end.

the neo-human is coming to light.

I've never been much for the mountains. The majestic overwhelming size is just too close. I love to watch them fly by my periphery as I drive through, but I couldn't be there. there would always be something in the way.

Hyper-Tensions

One of my favorite people once advised me that if I cant fall asleep, the best thing to do is face it. Get up, have a glass of milk and put your mind to work. Sadly my minds work, is blogging.
it seems an unlikely coincidence that in the past 4 years since high school that I have been a mild insomniac. When I was in high school, I used to read rants by this aforementioned favorite person about how most of his adult life has been lived at night. Nothing glamorous. Just doing nowhere things in nothing places, with some shitty late night TV in the mix to keep it interesting.
it just makes me wonder, if it infact is true that you are what you pretend to be. When I look at what I am now and who I was 5 or 6 years ago, I try and think of how I got to this point. Smoking, drinking, music, and insomnia. That would have been unheard of. At least most of.
and then I got back even more and I have to ask "why the long hair?" or "why the beard" and maybe "where the fuck did this ego come from?".
I am what I pretend to be. These questions all have painfully long answers. Point is that I'm exactly who I wanted be. I gave myself this persona and I carried it out. Its really not very hard.
problem is I've been this for too long and I need something new. Discovery is bored out of his goddamn mind.
still no sleep. Not even the slightest sign of fatigue. When I lay awake thinking of why I cant sleep I often wonder what it could be that causes this. Smoking? Drinking? Maybe the fact that I have the worst eating habits of all time? Could I actually fix this?
I make the commitment right then and there to make myself heathier. The problem is that once I get to sleep, its takes me about an hour to actually get out of bed. I wake up so tired that I just cant function. I don't have the energy to make myself real food so I eat chips or make myself a hot dog or some other god awful garbage meal. Then I feel full and gross so I have a cigarette. I sit at home, and maybe leave the house around 10pm when I finally get some energy. I drive everywhere, I never walk. I try at sleep around 2:30 and lay awake until 4. Repeat.
its a sad state of affairs really.
so really what can be done? Well I know what to do. Eat some vegetables stop smoking and sell my car.
I'm missing what city has to offer in the springtime. Trapped in a box.

when did my blog become a journal? Gross.

Honey Bunny

What is a blog for if not to make the most personal and amazing things impersonal on the cold cold internet.
last night I had several wonderful dreams. The first of which was the most vivid I've had in a while. I went to Bangladesh as a stop over going somewhere else. Every one was dressed so brightly and the people were obviously a in poverty, but were all so interesting and friendly. A little girl tried to sell me bottles of liquor that were already open but I had to decline. However, I was so impressed my the place that I didn't get back on my plane. I stayed for a really long time. Its hard to convey the full impact without going into grotesque detail which is fuzzy at best.
the dream then moved to star wars episode 3. I was in the theater with abby and a couple other people. The screen kept moving and we had to follow it. When the movie got out it was already light outside then somehow we ended up at a concert. It was a crunk band.
I wish I could remember more of the dream. There are many other bits pieces but they just don't fit in. The bangledesh part was amazing.
this is going no where, there's no way to convey what a dream actually means to you. Unless its a re-occurring dream. Then its a little easier.
someone help me out of this funk I seem to be in. Waking up late in the day wearing my hugest until its absolutely necessary to put on clothes. Something should probably be done. That's mostly what my dream was about.