the long way around

there's something so demeaning about the whole going out thing. hitting the town, painting red, and thousands of other cliches for leaving your house. then what? coffee? alchol? drugs? all three?
my social ineptitude maybe be disapearing but its right in time for everyone to leave. i suppose that's fine. this is all just a lament of a seemingly lost summer.
summer dreams of warm weather, warm romance and adventure. i guess at least there's been some decent weather.
i guess it is entirely true that you make your own misery. i knew this would happen. i predicted it eons ago. i had the whole miserable ting planned out before i even set foot on saskatoon's spring soil. i guess the only reason i stuck around was to watch the goddamn thing burn.
my feeling told me to hit the yukon. join the droves of summer vacationers and claima new horizon. i supose i did eventually, maybe just to taste what i gave away. i stayed here for so many reasons. mostly based on loyalty, pride and flase promises i made to myself. but i shoudl be sad about it.
it's all over now and i feel almost like i'm being realesed and i'm finally able to experience true freedom....as soon as i can pay for it that is.
no one has ever stood in my way and thats always been my greatest gift. i've just been waiting for something that wont ever happen. its pretty crazy to stay where you are when you have thousands of options. there's no need to prepare. nothign can ready you for the unknown, so i might as well just take a running start.